Weather the Storm

As I sit down to write another article about spring and stress relief, I am looking outside at dark gray skies and monitoring the weather alerts. Not exactly a beautiful spring day -- or is it? Granted, tornadoes and severe weather that cause significant damage and harm to others can be tragic and heartbreaking. However, rainy, stormy days have beauty in themselves. I love a good thunderstorm. Who does not like listening to the rain? It is a wonderfully relaxing sound. Listen to the wind whistle and howl. Even thunder has a relaxing quality. The clouds seem to zoom across the sky in various layers and shades of gray. I enjoy rainy days almost as much as sunny ones. I think of the rain as cleansing --  a baptism of sorts. It is like the Earth is taking a bath. So, do not be discouraged when the skies are dark and gloomy. Soak them in.   

It's Game Time!

Spring is the time for outdoor sports to resume. Drive around town and you are likely to see (and hear) children playing baseball, softball and soccer. Many children have already begun baseball or some form of it. While having children participate in sports can be stressful due to the added time and energy, try to enjoy the time you have. After all, you may be getting a little time to have conversations with adults outside of work. Enjoy the fresh air and sunshine. Cheer on your little ball player and enjoy the blue sky, the fresh air, the smell of popcorn and the sound of aluminum bats hitting a baseball or children cheering when they kick a goal.  Maybe you participate in adult league sports. This is another great way to enjoy the outdoors, get some exercise and have fun! Maybe baseball and soccer are not your thing, or your child's. Try golf, tennis or shoot some hoops in your driveway or local outdoor basketball court. There are activities for almost any interest and skill level from horseshoes to horseback riding. Get out there and participate in something! 

Work it Out!

We all know the benefits of exercise, right? Better physique, more energy, lower blood pressure, lower blood sugar and other health benefits. Did you know exercise can also improve your mood and reduce stress? I will refrain from getting too scientific, but moderate exercise releases  "feel good chemicals" in your brain. That is what is sometimes referred to as a "runner's high."  In addition, the sense of accomplishment from getting a good workout can also be exhilarating. That "Yes, I did it!" feeling can do wonders for stress. Now that it is spring and the temperature is pleasant, why not maximize the benefits of exercise on your mood and stress levels by getting outdoors. Run or walk briskly each day after work or early in the morning. Really be in the moment, get in touch with nature. Do some lunges, sit ups and squats in your yard, or in a local park if you do not mind other people watching. Practice Tai Chi or Yoga outside for a wonderful stress reducing exercise.  Get out there and work it out! 

Gotta add the disclaimer here: If you have significant health problems or physical limitations, talk to you doctor to determine which activity is appropriate for you. Don't hurt yourself.

Grow Your Stress Away

Spring is the season for gardening. Whether you enjoy watching flowers bloom or tomatoes turning red, there is something for everyone. You may be asking yourself, "What does this have to do with stress management?" Gardening is a great way to reduce stress and anxiety. Getting closer to nature is a wonderful way to manage stress, anxiety and also depression. While the initial effort may be, well, exhausting, once your plants are in the ground, fertilized, watered and mulched, you can begin reaping your rewards. For some, the physical effort involved in gardening is therapeutic in itself. It is sort of like sweating your stress away. Once your fruits and vegetables begin to grow and flowers begin to bloom, there is a feeling of satisfaction. Then there is the time when you can cut those flowers and put them in a vase on the dining room table and enjoy them while eating the produce you grew yourself. Delightful! However, not everyone has a green thumb. There are plants that are virtually foolproof, no matter what color your thumb is. Visit your local nursery and talk to them about what is available. Even if you don't have a yard, there are herbs, plants and flowers that can grow easily in a windowsill. Don't worry if your initial efforts are not a grand success, it happens to everyone. Gardening is a hobby that you never master (sorry Master Gardeners). There is always more to learn and do. Find your happiness . . . in the garden!

Fresh Air is Good for the Soul

When the temperatures rise and we come out of our winter shells, spending time outdoors can do wonders for mood stability, anxiety and stress. Just opening the windows and letting the fresh air flow through your home is enough to boost your spirits. On a glorious spring day, all you have to do is sit on a park bench or swing on your front porch to reduce the stress from a busy workday. While you are sitting, maximize the effects of the moment by listening to the birds chirping or the wind blowing. Feel the sun and the breeze. Look at the beautiful blue sky and watch the clouds as they move across it. Smell the flowers blooming or the fresh cut grass. Be totally in the moment. Feel the stress leaving your body. This is a wonderful mindfulness activity that is quite effective for reducing stress and anxiety. Try it today!

Spring is Here!

It's spring! It's that time of year when the temperatures are perfect, the skies are blue, birds are singing and flowers bloom. Those individuals who suffer from seasonal affective disorder, or "the winter blues," are feeling more like themselves again. This is a great time to take advantage of outdoor activities and reduce stress. I am a firm believer that spending time outside can improve mood, reduce stress and even help you sleep better. I will spend the next few days exploring outdoor activities that may help you find your happiness. I am certain that many of you already know and enjoy the benefits of spending time outside. Comment, email or message any ideas to me and I may include them!

Dads Get Stressed, Too

I have talked a lot about the stress of being a mom. I suppose that is because I have experienced such stress personally. However, I have not forgotten dads. Dads get stressed, too. The stress for dads is different, though, and men experience stress differently than women. That is in part because in our society men take on the role of caretaker, head of the family and "breadwinner." Although in recent years there has been a shift in these roles as women take on more financial responsibilities and earn more money, the perception that men have remains the same. This in itself causes many men a great deal of stress. They feel that the success and happiness of the family is dependent on them. If the family is struggling financially, men often feel that they have failed. This is particularly the case when men earn less money or lose their jobs due to layoffs and work reductions that have been so common in this economy. 

The expectations for men have also changed. Men now take on more roles previously assigned for women. They cook, clean and care for children in addition to their previous responsibilities. This change has occurred due to the increase of women in the workforce when compared to a few decades ago. While this change benefits women, who simply cannot reasonably work full-time and complete all of the responsibilities at home, it can be stressful for men who are still transitioning to that role. In a sense, it is emasculating. Cooking and cleaning are not "manly" jobs in our society. Taking care of children is not a masculine chore. Men should not be blamed or criticized for these feelings, it is inherent in our nature. Since the beginning of time men were the hunters and women were the gatherers. That was the society of that time and for many, many years of human existence. Our society is changing and evolution takes time. 

Many men have already adapted to their "new" roles and quite enjoy them. However, some men still struggle with changing roles, in addition to the general stress that men endure due to their "previous" roles. How can men manage their stress? Men experience and cope with stress differently than women. While many men have difficulty talking about their feelings, they should be strongly encouraged to do so. As a therapist I can tell you that men who have learned to express their feelings say that it does help. Find someone you can be honest and open with. It may be your wife or girlfriend, a best friend, a family member or a minister. If stress is significantly impacting you personally, at work or at home, consider talking to a therapist. Often just a couple of sessions make a difference. Also find relaxing activities to participate in regularly. Golf, fishing and gardening are great outdoor activities that can be enjoyed much of the year. Reading, exercising and strategy games can be done indoors. Prioritize your activities. You may not be able to get everything completed that needs to be done, but complete the most important things. Perhaps the most important, and possibly most challenging, relaxation strategy is to learn to let things go. If you cannot change it, then find a way to stop worrying about it. If you are doing your best, then your family will appreciate and love you no matter what.